The Most Important of All Human Qualities Is a Sense of Hope

 It's interesting to observe that some people fray under the pressure of experience, but eventually learn they're called to mend their life along the way, whereas for others this experience is not liberating. Like Humpty Dumpty, they have a great fall and apparently are unable to learn new things or to unlearn old ones. Consequently, to be a human being is, one wonders, to find the nectar available to us in our own journey. But lots of people pretend that they already know everything they need to know.

It is really incredible that in this day and age human beings remain as foolish as ever they were. Meanwhile, let's remember that the apostle Paul warned us, "be transformed by the renewing of your mind" (Rm. 12:2). He thought about our interior life. I do believe that the most important task in our lives is to make connections, that is, to make relations. Would there be another way to learn?

We live in a materialistic society and are trained from our earliest days to be acquisitive. No doubt, this materialistic outlook has seriously influenced our education. The other day, someone told me with sadness, "the only thing people are interested in today is earning more money." It seems that Mammon is worshipped as never before.

We have the task to live a good life without excuses. Although the moral implication of the attitudes of modern man is daunting, this should not dilute, or block, our search for companions for our journey. It is we who are responsible after all. So, it's foolish to blame others for our failures. The most important of all human qualities is a sense of hope. A sense of hope may take various forms, but the effect is always the same. It's only natural for healthy beings to look forward to something better.

Do you remember the Lilliputians and their neighbors attack each other because they couldn't agree which end to break an egg? Maybe aren't we all living like that? This is one of the chief functions of satire and irony. They enable us to see that many of our actions are comic or absurd. We are always reminded by good mentors that a happy and fulfilling life is not really far removed from ourselves.

The sense of hope must be single out as man's most important quality because it is associated with life itself. There's no future for human beings without hope.

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How To Stay Humble

Earlier on, whilst I was out shopping, I saw an image of a famous athlete with the words "stay humble" written on it. This is someone who is at the top of their game and is known all over the world.

It is clear that this person realises how important it is for them to keep their feet on the ground and not to let their current level of success go to their head. They are likely to know that even though they are the top right now, they could fall right to the bottom in a matter of seconds.

A Number of Ways

While I can't say for certain how this person stays humble, it is possible that they focus on where they have come from and how easy it would be for them to lose it all. Additionally, they may have a number of people around them that help them to keep their feet on the ground.

Still, even though this is so, it doesn't mean that there won't be moments when their current position ends up going to their head. If this does happen, it could be said that it is not much of a surprise, considering how successful they are and how so many people are likely to treat them like a god.

A Good Approach

Let's say that this person does focus on where they have come from and how easy it would be for them to lose it all; this is something that the average person can also do to stay humble. Having people in their life who don't get caught up in what they have achieved will also help.

What they could also do is to imagine that they are around someone who is full of themselves and to think about what it is like to be around someone like this. They are likely to find that there is nothing appealing about this person.

Going Deeper

The question is why would someone become full of themselves if they are successful in one area of their life or a number of areas? One way of looking at this would be to say that the reason this happens is because they have merged with their ego.

This is the part of them that basically allows them to have their own experience on this planet. Without this, it wouldn't be possible for them to have their own life and therefore, to fulfil their purpose for being here.

The Challenge

But although this part causes them to believe that they are separate from everyone and everything, it is nothing more than an illusion. When this is understood, they won't fully buy into the illusion that their ego creates.

However, if one is unaware of this, it will be normal for them to see themselves as being better or superior to others - or worse or inferior. The part of them that will allow them to see that they are no better or worse than others, their true-self, will have been pushed aside, with their ego taking over.

Final Thoughts

Taking this into account, the way for someone to stay humble will be for them to be mindful of when they get caught up in their ego. If this does happen, and they start to see the world through their egos dual nature, they can take a step back and acknowledge what has taken place.

There is then no need for them to shame or blame themselves; they are just becoming aware of what has taken place. What will most likely help with this process is for one to meditate as this will allow them to develop their observer self.

Author, transformational writer, teacher and consultant, Oliver JR Cooper, hails from England. His insightful commentary and analysis covers all aspects of human transformation, including love, partnership, self-love, and inner awareness. With over two thousand, three hundred in-depth articles highlighting human psychology and behavior, Oliver offers hope along with his sound advice.

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Becoming An Exceptional Human Being

Of all the goals and aspirations in life, having achieved a great variety of extraordinary experiences myself, I have determined that there is no better goal for ones life than to become an exceptional human being.

Exceptional means in all aspects of life, the three main ones being Financial, Relationships, and Self-esteem.

The material aspect covers finances and simply taking care of having all ones needs met to whatever level of luxury one desires. Relationships is not only marriage, but family, friends, co-workers etc. And third, perhaps the most important as it is the foundation of the other two, is ones relationship with oneself. A healthy self-esteem, which comes from a deep sense of knowing you are worthy of your own existence and place in the world.

My belief about the reason we exist, why be a human on this planet, is a rather long and more complex topic, but is simply explained with the analogy of a caterpillar.

A caterpillar has no choice but to become a butterfly, because it is ruled entirely by nature and instinct. Humans are 'designed' to also go through a metamorphosis, which is, according to my theory, the reason for our existence.

As the caterpillar is no longer recognizable in the butterfly, so is a selfish, arrogant, nasty, nervous, insecure person no longer recognizable if they transform into a humble, generous, kind, calm, balanced and selfless person.

The difference between humans and caterpillars is simply the one thing that sets humans apart from every other creature on this planet, which is that we have freedom of choice, at least to a degree. We can choose our actions, and if we cannot because of our emotional imbalances, we can choose to correct that imbalance and then be able to choose our behaviour.

I have now traveled in 86 countries, and studied humans from that many cultures only to find that despite the differences between adults with their opinions and cultural tendencies, we are all identical when we are children.

In every country, religion, culture and social class, wealth or poverty, a child is identical in its movements, interests, reactions and process of learning as it grows up.

Water is water and only changes depending on what is added to it, sugar, syrup, flavour, salt, pepper herbs etc. A human is born water and then their parents and cultural situation adds the flavouring that labels them into the adult they become.

Our work is to evaporate the water so it returns to purity and then choose by our own will what 'flavouring' we will add, if any. This is the reason for our existence, and the only purpose in life that I have found to be truly satisfying and never fades in its power to make life worthwhile.

The gift of freedom of choice that humans have over all other features is in fact also a curse. We have the choice to transform or to remain the same until we die, it is each persons individual choice. You can choose to stay a caterpillar and crawl through your life, or you can withdraw from your current life situation, and transform yourself, then emerge as something far more beautiful and free.

My life has been devoted to finding the ways to make this transformation. I have pursued great financial success as well as the monastic life. I have studied many spiritual traditions, and found all to be lacking as they no longer fit in the modern world. However, their essential principles remain the same.

Ethicalism.org gives the foundation of building a strong self-esteem, and from that, financial and worldly success, as well as making yourself into as good a partner as anyone can hope to have to share their life with. This is one way I am offering to achieve this, which one can take as far or as little as they choose towards their transformation.

It will take time to evaporate your fixed opinions and the limiting attitudes of your culture, but it can be done in a way that allows you to choose what to keep and what to let go of. If this concept resonates with you, Ethicalism.org is a start, and I am always happy to respond to any questions anyone may have to take the work further.

I will go into the process of 'evaporation' in Part 2

Ethicalism is simply a collection of ethics and practical exercises to help apply them in our life. In conducting ourselves such that we will live a satisfying and purposeful life, we strengthen our individuality and self-esteem, while opening up to deeper connections with ourself and others.

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Your Self-Talk And Mental Picture Determines The Level Of Dedication To Your Actions

Develop A New Consciousness And Awareness

What is the predominant self-talk that takes place in your mind? Is it affirmative or a disempowering voice that tries to convince you the world is a dark and scary place? It's easy to get pulled into this narrative because the voices are real and so we conclude they must be true. Or are they? I often use an exercise in seminars where I ask participants to tell me what they will think next. I explain, if they identify with their thoughts, surely they must know what their next thought will be. Unless there are psychics in the audience, rarely do people know what their next thought will be until it occurs. The point is: thoughts come and go from our minds and unless we give them meaning, they have little power in and of themselves.

So let's return to your self-talk. You might be accustomed to listening to the voice in your head, that perhaps you're no longer aware of the negative thoughts? Yet, that is what we must pay attention to if we want to change our circumstances. It's said: thoughts become things, meaning everything in the physical universe begins with a thought. The house or the apartment you live in exists because an architect had an idea for the design of the building. Your smartphone, laptop or computer, began its life with a thought. The point I wish to emphasise is: our reality is the result of our thinking, whether it be positive or negative. When negative circumstances show up, they merely shine the light on the truthfulness of our thoughts.

For example, consider a current problem in your life you want to improve. Do you believe there's a solution you haven't discovered yet? I'm hoping you will realise that the nature of your problem results from your thinking alone. This doesn't mean your thinking is flawed, it means you have directed your thoughts, whether conscious or unconscious to something unwanted and it has manifested as a result. Do you agree, if we want a different outcome, we must change our thoughts or at least our perception of the problem? It was Albert Einstein who once said: "We cannot solve our problems with the same thinking we used when we created them." Put simply: We must develop a new consciousness and awareness in which to perceive our problems from a higher level. The same consciousness cannot solve the problems created with our current level of thinking.

Awareness Shines The Light On Our Thoughts

How does this relate to your self-talk or mental picture influencing your actions? If we replay the same script and visualise it through the lens of negativity, it must eventually manifest in our life. We agreed earlier that thoughts become things. What we think about and give our attention to, must it show up in our reality? I'm not talking about the law of attraction but universal laws that govern the framework of reality. The Hermetic aphorism states: "As within so without." Meaning, what happens at the level of thoughts is reflected in our reality. When we combine self-talk with a mental picture, we add colour to what appears in our life. We define it and give it energy, irrespective of whether it is a negative thought or a positive one. This is an idea the motivational psychologist and author Dr. Shad Helmstetter emphasises in What To Say When You Talk To Your Self when he says: "Self-Talk is a way to override our past negative programming by erasing or replacing it with conscious, positive new directions. Self-Talk is a practical way to live our lives by active intent rather than by passive acceptance."

People often ask: Does it mean I need to be attentive to every thought? No, since that requires a lot of mental energy best devoted to other things. The key is to observe our thoughts with an expanded awareness instead of remaining unconscious to them. Awareness is the key that unlocks us from the prison of negativity and self-destruction. It is the key to inner peace and freedom because it is the filter for our thoughts. Awareness shines the light on the congruency of our thoughts. If we wish to change our external conditions, being aware of what we think is the first step. I often use the example of a ship changing course midway through its journey in the ocean. First, the captain must change course and map new coordinates and relay this information to his crew. The same is true of ourselves: our awareness shines the light on our inner self-talk and mental picture. If we wish to change our future, it must begin by observing our mind and becoming conscious of our unconscious thoughts. It is only then, the level of dedication to our actions become congruent with a shift in awareness.

Whether you want to improve areas of your life or achieve your goals, my Coaching Program will offer you the improvements you're looking for. The sessions are one hour and geared towards: coaching and guidance, conversations and of course powerful transformation.

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